Now, where was I?

Oh yes, throwing myself a pity party. Still doing it, though I have managed to take a small step back from depressions dark door but only a small one.

Have I ever mentioned how extremely passive I am? I mean, I've had that whole "doormat" thing down pat for years but damned if I'm not starting to get a bit tired of laying down like a good girl while people wipe their feet all over my ass. I'm sick, tired and done. Period. That's probably not good news for a few people but fuck if I care.

I'm feeling hostile today (for days), can you tell? I'll get over it eventually but in the meantime, I imagine that I'm not the best company, which is why I've been unusually quiet lately. I'm figuring that nobody wants to deal with a bitch sporting a massive attitude, and they shouldn't have to either. And poor Christie is taking the brunt of my bitchiness. I said the nastiest thing to her the other night and I felt like an asshole after I said it because it was obvious I hurt her feelings but sometimes she does the most asinine things and when I have so much on my own plate I just can't deal with her self-created dramas. I am sorry that I hurt her feelings though, I should have handled the situation with more sensitivity.

Well, aside from being abnormally pissy, I've been trying to get into Christmas (which is my absolute favorite holiday) but I'm having a bit of trouble this year. I started out good, but took a nosedive somewhere along the line. I actually chewed Christie's ass last night because she asked me a week ago if I'd leave half of the tree tinsel free so she could do it with Sarah and she still hadn't put tinsel on that half of the damn tree. It was a pointless and completely uncalled for arguement for which I apologized but that's textbook for me this week.

And I've had to have some serious talks with myself about jumping Drew's ass because though he's dragging his feet (which he explained today isn't his fault) he did agree to help me pay the rent that is currently 14 days late before I get tossed out on my ass. We (Drew and I) were (are still, I believe) at an impasse where financial responsibility is concerned and up until recently I hadn't asked him for any help finacially because I know how he feels about it and tried to handle it all myself but I just can't swing it on my own, I need his help.

Anyway, I wrapped a whole mess of presents (and managed to rip a good amount of skin off my bottom lip with the packing tape -- don't ask) after House and Law & Order: SVU were over because I needed to box them up so my dad could hit the post office today. One (Evan's, I think) of two boxes went out today but apparently I didn't give my dad enough money so he's going to have to go back and mail the other one (Angie's) tomorrow.

Oh, here's something happy to talk about... my mom and I took Cameron to the Magic Kingdom and MGM Studios to celebrate his birthday over the weekend. And God, he had a blast!! You should've seen his sweet face when we rode Splash Mountain, oh, and when he was exploring Tom Sawyers Island and the Osborne Family Spectacle of Lights at MGM. It was the best. And I can't even describe how good it felt to see him put all his troubles aside and just have fun. I love that little monster.

And that's all. Have a good one.