No snappy title tonight

Today was a bad day and I’m tired.

When Cameron woke up Wednesday morning, he wasn’t feeling well and although I’m hoping it’s just a really nasty cold, he had an extremely bad time of it tonight. My sister, Cameron and I were sitting on the couch and all of a sudden Cameron started coughing horribly, it was awful, no matter what we did he couldn’t stop and then he started vomiting all over the floor and his poor little nose started to bleed. I don’t know what’s wrong but I’m really worried about him. I don’t know if his doctors office is open because everything is a fucking mess down here but if they’re not and he isn’t better by Monday, I’m taking him to the ER because I know the damn hospital is open.

Christie came home today and it helped to have someone to talk to because I couldn’t possibly explain how lonely I’ve been. Plus, I had $60 that my mom sent my way but now I’m down $30 which I have to save for gas (Christie waited in line to get gas for over 3 hours today) because I used the other $30 for food and some over the counter medicine for Cameron, I haven’t collected a paycheck since Oct. 18th, they just announced that the schools will still be closed Monday and Tuesday next week and I don’t know if we’re going to be able to go back to work on Monday because there’s still no power there, I’m supposed to call and find out for sure tomorrow. Oh and they said on the news that they’re thinking of postponing Halloween in South Florida because of all the damage to Broward, Dade and Palm Beach Counties. And they’re right, it is too dangerous right now but it sucks because even that small piece of normalcy is being tampered with. Christie doesn’t give a fuck though, today she brought home two big and two little pumpkins and said, "Halloween is Monday and we’re going to carve our pumpkins tomorrow like we always do." But there may be no trick or treating for Cameron and that makes me sad.

You know, I’ve been trying to stay positive because there are people that have it so much worse but staying positive has been pretty hard to do lately.

And admitting all that just pisses me off because I’m stronger than that, dammit.

Sigh.