Eight.

Since he didn't forget or ignore it as I thought he would, I'll wish us, that'd be Drew and myself, a happy anniversary. It's been eight years since we said our "I do's" and though we've both changed and we're not "together" the way he'd like us to be there's still love between us. And really, that's what matters.

Gods, I'm tired.

Really, really tired. This horrific flu type thing that plagues me has sunk it's claws in deep and is just now starting to release its hold. Blah.

Aside from that, I'm stressed about life in general. Big things. Little things. All things. Every thing. Sigh. Top of the list are my never ending bills, the pesky things just refuse to stop tormenting me. It's really quite unfair, if you ask me.

And then, of course, there's my Cameron who is doing markedly better in some areas but remains incredibly stubborn in others. It's been a month since we started his "Behavior Chart/Rewards Program" and, for the most part, he's doing really well with the three "behaviors" we were working on improving. Though I haven't spoken to his doctor about it, I think it's time to move on to a new set of "behaviors". The ADHD testing is halfway done but the doctor is being completely mum about it and I really wish he wouldn't be.

The evenings this week are going to be crazy busy (which totally sucks) because my mom and I have a ton of things to get done for Robin's mothers memorial service this weekend. Honestly, I just want some rest and relaxation but it's not going to happen. If fate is kind, next week will be nice and peaceful.

That's it. There's nothing exciting or remotely interesting happening in my world at the moment.

Tedium.

1. Where were you 3 hours ago?
In bed which, incidentally, is exactly where I'd still like to be.

2. What is your boyfriends/girlfriends name?
I could tell you but then I'd have to kill you... Heh.

3. Have you ever eaten a crayon?
Well, if I have, I've apparently mentally blocked the whole wretched ordeal.

4. When is the last time you went to the mall?
Ah, let's see, I was at the Boca Towncenter yesterday but we didn't actually go past the restaurant out front so I'm not sure that one counts. As far as shopping, I don't know, December, I guess.

5. Are you wearing socks right now?
Nope.

6. Do you have a car worth over $2,000?
Seeing as I still owe over four thousand on it, I sure as hell hope so.

7. When was the last time you drove out of town?
End of May.

8. Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days?
Sure. Drew took me to see Evan Almighty Saturday night and I took Cameron to see Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer Sunday afternoon.

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?
I'm enjoying a cup of coffee as we speak (type--whatever).

10. What are you wearing right now?
Jean capri's and an olive green t-shirt.

11. Last food that you ate?
Coffee Cake Muffin.

12. Where were you last week at this time?
Pretty much the same place I'm at now.

13. What’s the last sporting event you watched?
I don't watch sporting events.

14. What is your favorite animal?
Ferrets.

15. What is your dream vacation?
As long as I'm free to relax, it's all good with me.

16. Last person’s house you were in?
Besides my own, Drew's.

17. How old are your parents?
They're both in their early fifties..

18. Have you been in love?
No doubt.

19. Do you miss anyone right now?
Absolutely, yes.

20.What are your plans for tonight?
I have to work late this evening but after that's done and over, I don't plan on doing much more than read.

21. Who is the last person you sent an e-mail to?
Kim.

22. Ever go to camp?
I don't believe so.

23. Were you an honor roll student in school?
Can't say I was.

24. What do you want to know about the future?
I don't know, I've never really given it much thought.

25. Are you wearing any perfume or cologne?
Nah, not today.

26. Where is/are your best friend(s)?
California, Minnesota, New England.

27. Do you have a tan?
I certainly don't.

28. What are you listening to right now?
Blessed quiet, my friends.

29. Have you ever drank your soda from a straw?
Mm Hm.

30. What does your last text message say?
"Whatcha doin?"

31. Do you like hot sauce?
Not particularly.

32.When was the last time you took a shower?
This morning, before work.

33. Do you need to do laundry?
Sure do.

34. What is your heritage?
A little bit of this, a little bit of that and a sprinkling of the other thing.

35. What’s on the radio?
Don't have it on just now so I couldn't say.

36. Are you someone’s best friend?
Perhaps.

37. Do you like fast food?
Depending on where it's from, to an extent.

38. Do you untie your shoes before you take them off?
I rarely wear shoes that need to be untied but when I do, nah.

39. What is the weather like right now?
It's hot and annoyingly humid but it isn't currently raining so that's something.

40. What book are you reading?
At the moment, The Calhoun Women: Catherine and Amanda by Nora Roberts.

Happy Birthday, Evan!

I hope it's positively splendid, love!

Enervated.

I think this has been the longest week of my life. No really. Between my full time job and my part time job and Cameron and various things on the home front and other outside the home dramas and the ear-throat-cold thingamajig I've managed to pick up, it's just about worn me all the way out. If today didn't happen to be Friday I think I might actually succumb to a bout of weeping.

And that doesn't include the e-mail with questions regarding the appraisal for my papaw's hourglass or the e-mail from Sasha about the horrific bit of writing I sent her for the next eBook that I've been ignoring. And not purposely, mind you, I just haven't found the time needed to calculate how long it takes the sand to move from one side of the hourglass to the other or have a phone editing session with Sasha, both of which need to be done. If I could somehow finesse a few extra hours into the day I might actually get it done. Sigh.

Other than all that, I've been alright, I guess.

Anyway, between the rewards Cameron has been earning for his "Behavior Management" program and Drew's connections at the movie theater, I think I've seen more movies in the last two months than I have in last five years. LOL. Spiderman 3 (twice), Shrek the Third, Prates of the Caribbean: At Worlds End, Knocked Up, Surf's Up and Oceans Thirteen. Cameron wants to see, Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, this weekend but I just don't know if there'll actually be time for that this weekend. I'm thinking I may have to squeeze it in sometime during the week or perhaps next weekend, we'll see.

Speaking of Cameron, my mom is taking him up to Okeechobee for the night so after I knock out one of the CVS stores, it'll be all me until sometime tomorrow evening. There will no doubt be a few things I have to do (getting a start on laundry taking top spot) but all in all, it should be a peaceful night. Thank the gods.

And that's all really. I hope you all have a perfectly peachy weekend.

Googlimage.

Do a Google Image Search with the answer to each of these ten questions and post one of the images you found along with your answers on your blog.

The Place You Grew Up...

Since my mother was involved with my sisters father during a good amount of my childhood and he wasn't exactly the dependable sort, we spent most of our time bouncing around between various efficiencies and motels on Ft. Lauderdale beach.

The Place You Live Now...

In 2004, after we sold our house, we moved to Coral Springs and while it's not the greatest, it's alright.

Your Name...

How cool is that? With my love of all things coffee, I figure it's pretty apt.

Your Grandmothers Name...

Was Hester, and out of the odd pictures that pulled up when I googled that name, this was my favorite.

Your Favorite Food...

I love all kinds of yumy things but there is nothing like a tender, juicy filet mignon.

Your Favorite Song...

Since the moment I heard it, I've been in love with "Love Song" by the delectable Pink (Have I ever mentioned that whole fantasy I have involving the lovely lady and some soft nibbling).

Your Favorite Drink...

Is a Midori Sour, of course. 3 oz Midori melon liqueur and 1-1/2 oz sweet and sour mix--don't forget the cherries!


Your Favorite Smell...

Why, it'd have to be the inside of my local Dunkin Donuts--that rich smell of coffee wafting through the air. Heavenly.

Your Favorite Shoe...

I'm partial to flip flops, always have been but my favorite is Groove's Newport (in black not brown).

Your favorite Number...

Is EIGHT.

Fluff, fluff and more fluff.

That's all I've got for you at the moment. Not that there aren't a myriad of things I could talk (bitch, vent, whine) about but I just don't have the energy for it.

So, you get fluff.

Metaphorically Apt

Sober

And I don't know
This could break my heart or save me
Nothing's real
Until you let go completely
So here I go with all my thoughts I've been saving
So here I go with all my fears weighing on me

Three months and I'm still sober
Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers
But I know it's never really over

And I don't know
I could crash and burn but maybe
At the end of this road I might catch a glimpse of me
So I won't worry about my timing, I want to get it right
No comparing, second guessing, no, not this time

Three months and I'm still breathing
Been a long road since those hands I left my tears in but I know
It's never really over, no

Wake up

Three months and I'm still standing here
Three months and I'm getting better yeah
Three months and I still am

Three months and it's still harder now
Three months I've been living here without you now
Three months yeah, three months

Three months and I'm still breathing
Three months and I still remember it
Three months and I wake up

Three months and I'm still sober
Picked all my weeds but kept the flowers

A Quick 35.

1. When you're home alone, do you still close the door when you go to the bathroom?
Not usually, no.

2. If you have to go grocery shopping, would you rather go alone or with someone?
Either way, I suppose, it doesn't really matter. But, when I'm in one of those methodical "I-need-to-get-the-hell-out-of-here" moods, it's much better (and absolutely quicker) to go it alone.

3. It's your best friend's birthday, do you buy them a gift even though they didn't buy you one for yours?
Absolutely, yes. Whether I get a gift or not is superfluous, if we're friends and I'm able, a gift you will get.

4. You win the lottery. Lump sum or small payments over a period of time?
My father would surely bristle but, lump sum.

5. Do you like your music loud or at a reasonable level?
It depends. When I'm just sitting around listening, I like it at a nice reasonable level but when I'm, let's say, cleaning or something equally as tedious, I like it loud to the point of ear piercing.

6. Are you a beach person or a snowy mountain person?
Tough one but seeing as I've never actually been to a snowy mountain, I'm gonna have to go with beach.

7. When do you brush your teeth?
I try for morning and night but mornings are absolute.

8. Can you watch scary movies alone?
Yeah, but I don't like to.

9. Soft bed or firm?
Firm because oddly, a soft bed wreaks all kinds of havoc with my body.

10. Would you rather stay home all day, or be out and about with some friends?
I'm for the peacefulness of home but I don't mind being out and about on occasion.

11. What's one of your worst memories?
Of this, I have a legion so it's hard to say.

12. Do you like to keep the peace or be confrontational?
Peace, my friends, peace.

13. Are you more likely to be with a large group of people or a few close friends?
A few close friends, large groups of people tend to make me uncomfortable.

14. What are your plans for October?
I have no plans for October.

15. If money were not a problem, where would you like to live?
Other than Not Here, I really couldn't say.

16. Are you close to your Mom and Dad?
Yes.

17. What is one fear that you can't seem to overcome?
Many but, keeping it simple, spiders.

18. Are you good at math?
Not particularly.

19. Do you kiss on a first date?
If it feels right, you bet.

20. Is there anyone that you regret ever meeting?
Yes.

21. Rate your life on a scale from 1 to 10.
At the moment, I'd give it a 4 but that could change (for better or worse) in an instant.

22. Would you rather have roommates or live alone?
I honestly don't know, each option has its appeal.

23. Do you like any of your friends a little more than just a friend?
That's such an open ended question and subject to individual interpretation but from mine, yes, of course I do. .

24. Do you like to drive?
Not even a little.

25. Do you hate anyone at the moment?
Not especially.

26. Do you give money to homeless people when they ask?
If I have it.

27. A weekend in Las Vegas or Miami?
Neither.

28. When you go to the store, do you have a list or just buy random things?
I suppose it'd be a cross between the two. I usually have a list but I don't always follow it

29. What do you wear to sleep in?
Nothing. Mostly.

30. You're having a bad day, what's one thing can make your day better?
My Cameron. And then there's my Drew and my Evan and my Angie and my Nina and my Jeff.

31. Is there anything you would change about your body if you could?
Only everything. Sigh.

32. You wake up in an unfamiliar place, what is your first reaction?
Well, that would depend on the circumstances, I imagine.

33. Is there anything that you should be doing right now?
Sure there is.

34. If there was a way to know when and how you're going to die, would you want that information?
No, I don't believe I would. Honestly, I'd rather just take things as they come and live my life without knowing the how's and when's of its ending.

35. It's 4am, and your phone is ringing, who would it be?
I have no clue but it better be damned important.

Big Girls Don't Cry.