Aimee.

My Cameron, with his missing two front teeth, his shaggy sun lightened hair (I really need to take him to get a haircut) and his cute little sunburned nose, is finally home. He called me at work as soon as he got here and I swear, I wanted nothing more than to come home and snuggle with my baby. Gosh, I missed that kid. And let me tell you, his summer vacation is off to a good start--my mom and Robin bought him an ATV to keep at their house for when he visits (not good for my sanity at all, but he’s not complaining) and my dad bought him a pair of Heely’s (Oh, how I loathe those things and another thing that’s detrimental to my sanity, but again, he’s not complaining about that either). So he’s a happy camper.

There’s really not much of anything else going on. Work was extremely busy today, but it has been for the past few months. And after work I went to Curves with my mom which was oddly relaxing, I don’t know why, but it was good.

Anyhow, I have my appointment with Dr. Cox tomorrow, which was originally scheduled because my insurance company is refusing to authorize any more infusions after the next one until I go in for an evaluation (which is just silly because this thing I have isn’t going anywhere, but they do that from time to time). But as it turns out, it’s a good thing I already have the appt. because I now need one. It’s a pisser too because I was so sure I’d gotten past that last surgery without any complications. There were some problems in the beginning with the incision site, but I followed the doctors instructions perfectly and all seemed okay, it closed up, no problems, that is, until yesterday when part of it decided it wanted to reopen again. Ah well, it’s just a small area, but I’m worried about infection because I have a bitch of a time when it comes to healing any kind of infection. So I’m hoping since I caught it so quickly, it’ll be an easy and painless fix, I doubt it, but I’m trying out this whole "positivity" thing today.

So that’s it. I think I might actually go to bed in a few instead of sitting up until some ridiculous hour and waking up cranky.

Night all.

Aimee -- Self-pity is the mood of the day.

And I’d really love to go back to Sunday’s post with the pretty picture and the happy mood, but I can’t seem to make it back to the particular place I was in then. Not to say that I’m not still happy, I am, but as is typical, when I let my guard down a bit something comes up to kick me in the ass, showing me that I can’t be quite as complacent with myself or my health as I’d like to be. So I’ve been wallowing (which I was sternly reminded accomplishes absolutely nothing and is just a waste of energy).

Anyhow, since I already have an appointment scheduled with my immunologist this Wednesday for routine maintenance (LOL), hopefully we’ll be able to fix this problem quickly and it won’t be near as bad as it has the potential to be. Some positive thoughts probably wouldn’t hurt.

My baby still isn’t home and he won’t be until tomorrow after I’m already at work. Apparently Christie had too much to drink and wasn’t capable of driving back from Okeechobee so he has to stay another night. If it wasn’t so far and didn’t cost me an arm and a leg in gas I’d go get him myself because I could really use one of his comforting hugs and sweet kisses.

And that’s all for today. It’s back to laundry duty for me.

But before I go, this is where I want to be right now with the man who makes my heart flutter...

I can feel the magic floating in the air
Being with you gets me that way
I watch the sunlight dance across your face and I've
Never been this swept away

All my thoughts seem to settle on the breeze
When I'm lying wrapped up in your arms
The whole world just fades away
The only thing I hear
Is the beating of your heart

‘Cause I can feel you breathe
It's washing over me
Suddenly I'm melting into you
There's nothing left to prove
Baby all we need is just to be
Caught up in the touch
The slow and steady rush
Baby, isn't that the way that love's supposed to be
I can feel you breathe
Just breathe

In a way I know my heart is waking up
As all the walls come tumbling down
I’m closer than I've ever felt before
And I know
And you know
There's no need for words right now

‘Cause I can feel you breathe
It's washing over me
Suddenly I'm melting into you
There's nothing left to prove
Baby all we need is just to be
Caught up in the touch
The slow and steady rush
Baby, isn't that the way that love's supposed to be
I can feel you breathe
Just breathe

Caught up in the touch
The slow and steady rush
Baby, isn't that the way that love's supposed to be
I can feel you breathe
Just breathe

I can feel the magic floating in the air
Being with you gets me that way

Breathe by Faith Hill

Angie's Entry

Well Saturday night was fun. I lost both games, but Brother won both, and he needs the money for the new car he going to get today, hopefully. His current car is a piece of crap. But I think I was able to talk him into getting rid of it before it dies on him and he's stranded somewhere between here and Vermillion with a huge towing bill. His girlfriend's dad works at a dealership and get put him into pretty much anything he wants. He's due to drive back to Vermillion this week so I asked him to please dump the old car before it dies.

Poker was fun, Sista's girlfriend was the drunk for a change. So I got to sit outside with her for a while and talk which is cool. Even though she beat me three hand in a row the first game with a full house each time. I still love her. Her queso dip is the best thing on the planet.

I didn't get to see hottie. At all. He ended up having to watch his son and his nephew or something crazy and he was pissed off about it cause he was really looking forward to playing with us. So I was bummed. We were hoping that he'd get home before we started game two so he could play, but no such luck. So no flirting or one on one time for me.

Sista wanted me to take a shot at her friend's brother, but um no thanks. Yeah he's a nice guy and all but, he's a little to loud for my tastes. I can be loud too, but I dunno. When I went out the second game, he came and sat outside with me and was - emotional about his brother and the stuff that he's going through. I mean he's a nice guy and all, but not really my type.

Sista was like S is a really good guy, way better than Ben. My how quickly we turn huh? At least that's what I was thinking. I told her, yeah S is a nice guy but not my type and I'm too into Ben to really take an interest. She's like - why. Cause Ben's a good guy too, and definitely more mellow. S is a little too high strung and apparently can't hold his liquor very well.

Work is very quiet today, but I'm wearing my new shoes and holy crap are they comfy. Lunch just got here. Famous Dave's BBQ, so it should be good. We had bagels and OJ for breakfast and we only have to work until 2.

It's susposed to get nasty this afternoon with some isolated but potentially severe thunderstorms, hail and wind. It was windy yesterday but it helped cause it was so humid. I finally broke down and turned on the air last night at like 9. I just felt so bad for my doggy. It's going to get to 92 today, yesterday it was 97 I believe.

Other than that, it was a quiet weekend. I didn't gain a pound back and that makes me very happy. I felt really good Saturday. Sista said I looked really good too. I'm just happy to be hovering around the 150 mark.

Well, I'm going to head down the isle here and grab some lunch even though I'm not really hungry!

Have a good day!!

Aimee's Entry.

I don't particularly like when people watch me sleep because it's a vulnerable time, you have no control over what you're doing or how you look, but strangely enough, I actually like this picture.



If this is how I looked every time I sleep I probably wouldn't mind it so much, but seeing as I look at myself every morning in the mirror, I can assure you that this peaceful thing I've got going on is a rare thing.

Anyhow, I don't really have all that much to talk about. Life's been pretty good lately, I'm happy and I like it, now I just have to try and keep it.

Only downside at the moment is my Cameron is gone, he's at his grandma's until Monday afternoon and I miss him. I miss cuddling up with him in the mornings and hanging out with him in the afternoons and tucking him in at night. I can't wait until he comes home.

And that's it. I hope you all are having a lovely weekend and Ang, I hope you felt my positive vibes, cupcake!

Angie's Entry

I'm here at my part time job, I'm done with all my work and now it's my to mess around before I leave.

Anyone have any plans for this long weekend? Mine are work today for a while then I'm going up to Sista's to play cards tonight. Tomorrow - nothing planned so far. Monday I'll be working at my full time job. Who's going to pass up holiday before their trip to Vegas? Not I. I need to bump before I go cause I won't be getting paid for the week I'm going to be gone.

Updates: I haven't seen Ben or talked to him. But he wasn't happy about going to court with his ex earlier this week. I haven't heard the verdict, but I'm sure I will tonight. I'm hoping that he comes over and plays cards with us. He's got his son this weekend, but that hasn't stopped him before. So please send me some good vibes!!

Brother texted me this morning and I swear if he backs out of this game tonight, I'm driving up to St. Cloud to personally beat the crap out of him. Never mind that he's 6' 5" and out weights me by 75 pounds. We,me and Sista, put this game together for him, cause he's missed the last two times we've all gotten together to play - so he better decide that playing cards with us is a better time than UFC with Steve. But he's grown man and can make his own decisions. . . .

Yoga class was cool - it kicked my butt but it's a workout. Anyone who thinks that streching and balancing isn't a workout - I challenge you to try yoga. Pilates - you gotta have a solid core man. It was a good workout, but it makes me realize how out of shape I am. But I am wearing clothes that I haven't been comfortable in, in almost a year and those clothes are loose, even baggy which makes me really happy cause I feel good and that's the best part.

I did weigh myself this morning and I'm down!! I normally wouldn't post my weight, but I'm proud of this and I hope I continue to lose like this before I leae for Vegas. I'm down to 156.5 as of this morning. I'm proud of this because I'd been up and down between 159 and 162 for a couple weeks. So I'm going to take it easy on the drinking this weekend so I don't go and gain it all back.

Besides that, it's susposed to hit 90 today and near 95 tomorrow. Can you say welcome to summer in MN?

Well, I've learned that if I buy smokes, even with intention to leave them at my part time job so I don't have to bum them off my co-workers, I carry them with me like my childhood blankie. Yes, I'm smoking again. Sort of. I don't smoke in my house - I smoke maybe one a night in the garage. Half and half. It's still bad that I've started again, but ya know what, I will stop again. I'm making a pack last almost a week.
I know, excuses, excuses. But I really like to smoke. But I can quit again if I want to and that's power.

My friend Amy, that I'm going to Vegas with was in a pretty bad car accident, but she and her son are ok. She's sore and a little banged up, but she assured me that Vegas was still on. She's bruised but she's got muscle relaxers and she plans on getting a lot of rest this weekend.

14 more days to Vegas!! I can hardly believe it. The closer it gets, the more excited I get.

I bought these cute/sexy shoes last night and they're even comfortable. Their espadrills, black or course, but before I go to Vegas I'm going to go back and get the white ones. I fit into a smaller size, a whole size smaller than I normally wear. They have the long ribbons that tie up your chin, just over you ankle. I love them.

I looked at the house across the street from Sista last Friday. I like it, I don't love it. So I called my current mortgage holder and they pre-approved me for the loan amount if I want to put in an offer. I talked to my realtor, he's checking with another mortgage source and is going to get back to me. I also have to call a friend of mine that's a loan officer and see what numbers he can come up with.
I was really surprised that they approved me for the amount that I would offer on the house. I don't think I could afford the payments, well I could but then I'd be right back where I was 3 months ago and I don't want to do that. I just got ahead and comfortable with my finances again. I don't want to go house poor. But the house is newer, nicer than mine with a full finished basement, three car garage, nice big kitchen. And the best part, its right across the street from Sista who would be my lawn care and exterior care professional. For no fee, other than the occasional meal. Added bonus, I'd also be right across the street from Ben.
As a matter of fact, the house is really a slightly smaller version of his. Hmmm, something to think about huh? LOL

Ok, I'm outtie campers. I'm gonna go home and try and burn a CD then head up to Sista's for a night of cards and hopefully A LOT of flirting with hottie Ben.

Question: Is it weird that we've slept together but haven't exchanged numbers??
*earlier this week, Teresa told me if I was worried about him, then I should call him. So I said this to her. "I have his cell number"
"Well then call him"
"I can't"
"Why"
"Cause he didn't exactly give it to me"
"How did you get it?"
"Sista has it written on her garage wall and I put it into my cell phone. So I can't call him"
"Sure you can"
"And what am I susposed to tell him when he asks how I got his number? Tell him I memorized it and put it in my cell? Yeah, cause that's not stalkerish at ALL!"
"Good point"

I'm not going to push anything with him, but I really like him. A lot.

Have a safe and fun weekend!!

I'm bored.

Bored I say. No really, I am. Extremely. Emphatically. And I think terminally.

In other news, I just found out that my mom is taking Cameron to Okeechobee for Memorial Day weekend and if I actually ever did anything remotely fun I might be excited about having a free weekend, but I don't.

Anyway, I was in such a bitchy mood yesterday when I posted about the birthday party (bet none of you were the wiser--I'm good like that) because I'd just had an altercation with the lady three doors down (heh, I like them--the band, not the lady) over the fact that her daughter smashed this water gun Cameron had won at the birthday party to bloody pieces. It pissed me off and her daughter has a smart mouth so when she was up in my face telling me that Cameron got her wet, I pretty much told her I could care less and that she needed to keep her hands off my sons shit. Yes, I said "shit", sue me. Frankly, I don't care, I've had it with this kid and her little sister, they're bullies and there is NOTHING I detest more than a bully.

Well, little miss smart mouth decided to run home and tell her mommy that I was cursing her, so, of course mommy felt inclined to come set me straight. It was all so pointless really because whatever I actually managed to get in fell on deaf ears [...her oldedst daughter threw crayons at Cameron while he was passing by on his scooter for no fucking reason which left welts on his face--doesn't matter, I cursed her daughter. Her youngest daughter hit Cameron across the leg with a stick because she thought it was a good idea? Who knows, I don't--doesn't matter, I cursed her daughter. Her oldest son (who's 12, mind you) took Cameron's Ninja Turtles sword away from him and started smacking Cameron across the side of the head with it because he could I suppose--doesn't matter, I cursed her daughter. Her youngest daughter was trying very hard the other day to ram her bike into Cameron while he was riding his scooter in hopes of knocking him off--doesn't matter, I cursed her daughter. Her oldest daughter has a nasty mouth that rivals mine--doesn't matter, I cursed her daughter. Oh there's more, but I'm thinking you get my point...], I cursed her daughter and apparently there ain't nothing in the world that justifies that offense (I disagree, but what the fuck do I know?), besides, Cameron's a liar, blah, blah, blah--the fact that I'm neither blind nor stupid and have seen her kids do all this was really just a moot point and wasn't up for discussion. My kid is bad and that's that.

So after she (a) ordered me to keep my son off her side of the townhouse complex (which isn't fucking likely) and (b) ordered me to knock on her door when I have a problem with her kids (which, if she was actually paying any attention to what the hell her kids are doing, wouldn't be necessary), she went storming off and I called Drew and told him to handle it since it was obvious nothing I said was going to make a difference. He called their father and apparently all is right with world now, everything is just fucking dandy. But I disagree?

Why? You ask.

Because it wasn't her who had to console one of her sobbing children over the loss of some silly plastic toy that while easily replaceable, is something he was incredibly proud of, he won the silly thing all by himself in a game at the birthday party and I can't replace the meaning of that. Matter of fact, she's never had to console any of her children over something my son has done to them, said to them or broken of theirs, but I can't count the number of times I've had to. So no, everything is not right in my world and it isn't fucking dandy, bullshit is what it is and I've had enough of it.

Alright, now that I've gotten that out, I'd like to apologize to Jeff for being a bitch yesterday, he happened to catch me just after that happened and I was a bit off with him. I'm sorry, my friend, it was bad timing and I should've waited to get back with you until I'd calmed down.

Well, I'm done. I hope you all are having a much more entertaining day than I.

Creepy Crawly Things--Ick.

Well, I didn't really do much of anything worth blogging about this weekend, but today I did take Cameron to Kim's son, Nick's, 10th birthday party and he thought it was super-cool! And best of all, he got to touch a bunch of creepy, crawly, slimy things. Fun stuff.

Aimee

I had such a rough day yesterday. It sucked. And you know, if I had a dime for every person that's claimed to "love" me and then turned around and fucked me over I'd be a very rich woman, but fate's not quite that kind. Maybe I was a wicked evil person in another life and karma's just now catching up.

Oh well, I refuse to talk about the whole he said/she said bullshit that spiraled out of control late yesterday and left me standing smack in the middle of a no-win situation because it'd just upset me again and then I'd start to sulking again which would lead to crying again and honestly, I'm just not in the mood.

And because I haven't said so in a while, I want to now. There are a whole myriad of reasons I love Angie so much and her magical way of soothing my fears and reversing my ridiculous bouts with self-doubt are just a couple. I swear, without her strength, resolve, support, friendship and love I think I'd be lost or a couple more steps toward complete insanity! I love you, cupcake! Thank you for lovingly smacking me back into reality today! You're the bestest and you know it!

Anyway, it's Friday, I get to sleep in tomorrow and that's a lovely thought.

I hope you all have a kickass weekend.

Aimee -- Meme.

I saw this on Drew's blog, and I thought it was pretty cool, besides I haven't done one of these in a while.

I AM: Whatever you want me to be or is it whatever I want to be? I don't know, the lines get a bit blurry at times.

I SAID: I was absolutely not going to make the same mistakes my mother has, but instead, I went and proved that the apple certainly doesn't fall too far from the tree. Ah well, c'est la vie, besides I love my mom, mistakes and all, so I have no problems following in her footsteps.

I WANT: To be happy with myself because if I'm not happy with myself how can I expect anyone else to be? Self-love (no, not that kind) is important.

I WISH: I were a bit more self-sufficient. I've depended on someone else (my mom, my dad, Drew, etc.) to help me when things get rough for so long that it's been a bit of struggle to get into the habit of working things out myself, but I'm getting there--slowly.

I HATE: Prejudiced, stubborn, single-minded people--they're dangerous.

I MISS: My figure. I lost it after I had Cameron and sadly, I've just never been able to find it again.

I FEAR: So many things, but on a less serious note, spiders--I'm deathly afraid of them. I jumped into the Loxahatchee River because one fell on my leg during a canoe trip, apparently Gators are bit less intimidating to me.

I HEAR: Voices [...insert scary, freaky, cheesy horror movie music here..]. Nah, I'm just kidding, I don't.

I WONDER: If I'm going to have the willpower to make it through the first two phases of this bloody diet (I'm still in Phase 1 since I just started seriously following it last Monday)? You know, my wicked, evil father was trying to convince me that I needed to have a piece of this chocolate fudge pie that he bought last night because as he puts it, "It's the best damn chocolate pie I've ever tasted." Sigh. I'm happy to say, I resisted the temptation.

I REGRET: A hell of a lot of things, but I suppose that's just a part of life.

I AM NOT: Where I want to be quite yet, but I'm getting there.

I DANCE: All the time! I love to dance! I'm not very good at it, but I don't let that bother me.

I SING: Every chance I get and I won't apologize for it even if it caused you pain.

I CRY: Often. And I won't apologize for that either.

I AM NOT ALWAYS: Wise, not by a long shot, but some of my loveliest memories happened during foolishly unwise moments .

I MADE: A rather awesome cake for Cathy's birthday a couple weeks ago--it was oh so yummy.

I WRITE: Every chance I get, but my muse has been unusually quiet lately.

I CONFUSE: Myself quiet comically and quite often.

I NEED: To win the lotto, no really, I do.

I SHOULD: Probably be working right now, but I just don't wanna. You feel me?

I START: All sorts of projects that I never finish--I need to stop doing that.

I FINISH: Work at 5:00 p.m., bet you were dying to know that.

I TAG: Whoever feels inclined to do it.

Ouch, ouch, ouch.

My god, I couldn't possibly put into words how bad my head hurts right now. It's bad, really really bad! I need a hug and someone to massge my temples and maybe someone to kiss it better too. But since none of that's going to happen, I think I'll go grab an ice pack from the freezer and beat myself senseless with it or maybe I'll just hold it against my head--whichever.

Angie's entry

Hello Aimee love,

I'm so glad you had a fun Mother's Day! You deserved it!!

So what's new with me?

Saturday I worked at my part time job from 7 am until 5 pm. I got everything done that I wanted and put in some good hours to add to my Vegas fund.

When I got home, I took the dog for a walk, made some dinner and then took a short nap in my chair. Then I rinsed the carpet that I've been cleaning for over a week.

Sista called and said we probably wouldn't be playing poker. Ben was having some baby mama drama.

So here's the gossip I have:
I don't remember what he said his ex's name is so bear with me. So here's where the story begins - she asked her parents to watch C so she could go out with her friends on Wednesday night, then went out and got plowed. I mean loaded. But she got a ride home and left her car at the bar. Well she slept it off for a couple hours then decided that she needed to go get her car.
Well, on her way home, she got stopped. By a state trooper. Not good. Not good at all. So she was arrested, after blowing a .13, (I believe and since MN just chagned our limit to .08) and taken to jail. She called her parents who basically told her to rot in jail, leaving her to her last resort - calling Ben. Who, being the good guy he is, went and spent all day, missing a day of work to bail her out. After he'd missed a day of OT last week cause she changed her plans on him at the last minute.

Now according to my friend here at work who used to work in the jail system - the bail he paid to get her out was pretty significant.

Sista's girlfriend is doing the same kind of work says that ol girl is screwed: "The only thing saving her from maybe doing any jail time is it happened in XXX County and they are packed. . . . Girlfriend does all DWI stuff as an agent right now and she said girl is screwed cuz she was already on probation for her first one. . . .she'll be lucky if she walks away with house arrest. Ben said she got busted by a Highway Patrol so she's down the river. . . . . too bad really but she does sound like a bit of a loser."

Can you imagine? You're on probation for your first DWI and you get arrested for a second. Yikes. Bad choices.

So I've been thinkin about Ben all weekend, hoping he's dealin ok. Sounds like he may become a full time parent a lot sooner than he thought he would. But at least C has one parent that has it together.

Call me selfish, and it is I know, but I just don't want this to change the direction that I think Ben and I were headed in. I swore that I wouldn't get involved with a guy with a kid again, but I guess it has to be the right guy - and Ben could be that guy.

I don't know if it's because I'm getting older or what, but I've been thinking more and more about kids and a serious realtionship. Maybe it's because all of my friends are either married or - well, married.

The company I work for is awesome, I can't believe that I didn't come back to work for them sooner. In preperation for our health fair on Friday, they are offering onsite fitness classes. I have signed up for two. Yoga tomorrow night and Pilates Thursday.

I think I'm going to call my realtor that sold me my house and get a walk through on the house across the street from Sista. I won't know if I could get it unless I try right? New house or a newer car? Mom's vote was a new house. At least a house would appreciate in value. Something I can really invest in. So I just sent the email off to him and we'll see what happens. I don't know if I'll qualify because I just changed jobs, I haven't looked at my credit lately and I'm just not that lucky.

Other than that, there's not really much to speak of.

I'm still trying to lose 10 pounds before I head to Vegas in less than 4 weeks. I need all the help I can get, so any thinning thoughts you can send my way would be super!! I keep bounching between a few pounds and it's making me frustrated.

I hope all Mother's had a wonderful Mother's day - my "child" didn't get me anything. As a matter of fact, I took her to Grandma's to visit. Dang brat.

Ok, well, I gotta head off and look like I'm working.

Take care and I'll "see" ya soon!

Aimee -- Ho Hum.

Sigh. It's only Monday--ho hum--and I find myself ridiculously annoyed by, well, just about everything today. Don'tcha just hate those days? I do.

And it looks like the wrath of hell is about to break loose outside, I do believe it's going to rain (how's that for stating the obvious?), but it's okay because we need it BAD. Those damn brush fires just keep getting closer and closer and that's some scary shit.

I have to weight in and measure at Curves tonight which, seeing as I went completely off my diet while I was in Orlando this weekend, somewhat sucks, but it's alright because I happen to know I'm down almost a full pant size and that's a good thing, it makes me happy and I haven't been happy with myself in a long time.

Anyhow, my weekend was wonderful. I had such a good time just strolling through Epcot with my mom and they had some of the most beautiful flower displays I've ever seen, it was all so lovely (when I'm not feeling so lazy I'll post some pictures). And we went to Animal Kingdom too, I've never been there, it was awesome and I'm sorry we didn't have more time to spend there, but I think my mom wants to go back in December for Cameron's birthday. Oh, oh, oh I got to ride Expedition Everest and it was a badass ride! My mom had a death grip on my arm through the whole ride and when it came to a stop she yelled, "Oh, Aimee, I LOVED IT!" LOL. I wanted to go again, but we didn't have time. And we rode this river rapids ride and got completely soaked so we had to go back to the hotel room and change before heading over to Epcot for our lunch reservations, but it was so worth it. It was good, all of it.

We came back early afternoon yesterday and aside from being sick to my stomach all day, I had a great day! Cameron made me the sweetest little card with all these cute little fuzzy things glued to it and he also got me a coffee scented candle, it smells so yummy! Drew bought me a battery charger for my digital camera and took Cameron and I out to dinner! My dad and papaw got me purple roses, sigh, they were so beautiful! My mommy bought me this adorible little Cinderella frame, it's all sparkly--I love it--and some of my favorite panties! And Jeff and Nina sent me a beautiful card! Thank you all, you're the best and I love you all incredibly!

So that's it, I'm not in a very good mood today and I still feel a bit sick to my stomach, but I had a really good weekend.

Alrighty...

I'm all packed up and ready to go, so that's it, Aimee's outta here, headed north (Orlando) til Sunday.



(hee hee, you like my Batman backpack? I don't know why, but anytime I go anywhere, I take that silly thing with me)

I hope you all have a fabulous weekend! And in case I don't make it back in time...

Happy Mother's Day!!

***AMERICAN IDOL***SPOILER ALERT***

What in the bloody hell is wrong with America??













That's it, I disown the lot of you!

Alright, alright--I don't, but why Chris Daughtry? Why? I ask. WHY? What in the hell is with that?

I'm so bummed, Chris should've been in the finale.

*unhappy*sigh*

Angie's weekend

So Friday when I left here, I went up to Sista's and we planted flowers, cleaned up the garage and tried to get Ben's attention while we were sitting on the patio having a break. He had his headphones on so he couldn’t hear us. So we finished the garage, then went over and rang his doorbell and invited him over for a beer. He said he’d be over in a little bit so we went in to help girlfriend clean up. She had things under control so we talked for a bit. My nephew wanted to show me his new video game. So I watched him play for a while then my niece came in and sat with us. I heard Ben’s voice, so I knew he was in the house. A few minutes later my Sista came in and says “getchur butt out here, someone wore a lot of cologne for you!”

So we hung out in the kitchen for a while, then the three of us went out to the garage to smoke. One of my Sista’s other neighbor’s came over and we bs’d with him. Ben had hardwood floors put in a few weeks back, his brother does it for a living, so I told him I wanted to see them. So me, Ben and the neighbor went over and checked them out. Then I told Ben I wanted the rest of the tour since I’d only seen the upstairs, so the neighbor left and he gave me a tour of his house.

After we ate, me, Sista and Ben hung out in the garage and played two quick games of Texas, while Ben and I flirted, then it was time for everyone to go home. Ben had to work, I had to work and Sista had to help girlfriend the next day so we said goodnight around midnight.

Saturday I drove all the way down to work to find out that the access card that I borrowed didn’t work, so I couldn’t get into the building. So at 7:30 on Saturday what’s there to do? Well, drive back home is number one. I didn’t go tanning on Friday so I drove by there, they didn’t open for another hour. So I went shopping to see if I could find some new work/not quite summer/not quite winter clothes. No such luck, but I did find a couple cute tank tops.

I’d finally stalled enough and went over to go tanning. Then I went home, took the dog for a walk since it was 9:30. I started phase I of carpet cleaning. I called sista and told her I’d be up around noon to help her finish running around.

The birthday party went good, everyone had fun. We sat out in the garage and bs’d until Ben got home, cause we had to wait for him before we started poker. He invited his sister up, and we started about 8:30. Of course Ben sat next to me and we flirted. I won some pretty awesome hands, but girlfriend took the all time best hand with a freakin ROYAL FLUSH! She wasn’t feeling well, so she finally went out so she could go sit in the house. I ended up winning that game! Yey me! After the game was over, one of Sista’s buddies, Jeff, left.

So Sista, me, Ben and his sister played another game then sista had to go in to tend to girlfriend and I told Ben I wanted to go out back swing. So we walked over to his house, said bye to his sister then went out to the swings. He wanted to go crash the bonfire a couple houses down, but I wouldn’t let him. So we hung out on the swings and talked for a while.

We finally went in cause it was getting a bit chilly.

I laid down on his couch in the living room and he joined me a few minutes later. He moved closer to me and things got hot and heavy. He asked if we should move so we did. I don’t know how detailed I want to be or how much you really want to read, but – he had really good smelling candles lit in his room when we went in there, which surprised me. I wouldn't have expected that a guy I'm going to sleep with would light candles. He’s a great kisser and he’s a cuddler (sp) and I love that.

He had to work this weekend but I told him I’d wake him up – and I did. Not like that tho. I just put my hand on his back and told him what time it was.

Sista just emailed me and asked how things went. She said she saw him yesterday and he thought he was still drunk when he went to work. I still can’t get a read on that from him. Ya know how you can tell when people are drunk, their eyes close or they slur their words? He doesn’t do any of that, so it’s hard to tell.

But Sista and I were talking on Friday and she said that if he’s hot on someone, he doesn’t really say much to her, not that he would to her anyways, especially about me. The only time he's talked to Sista about a girl is when the latest ex - Tina went psycho on him. But we both agreed that he wouldn’t have started anything with me because he knows that Sista and I are tight and that I’d be around and stuff, so. Later that night he went into the house while we were playing cards and she said she didn’t/doesn’t think that I’m reading things wrong. But I guess I keep waiting for it to not be real. I keep waiting to turn the corner and see a strange car in his driveway and it's someone new. Which is why I'm trying really hard not to get hung up on him, but it's hard.

Sunday morning, like I said I woke him up so he wouldn’t be late for work. We had a smoke and then I headed out. I told him I'd get going so that he wouldn't be late for work. We still haven’t exchanged numbers, but Sista has his cell number written on her garage wall, so I memorized it. I know, I’m psycho. I haven’t called him or anything, but I have it. I also know when his birthday is.

Oh and his eyes are blue, not brown as I stated previously. I was thinking brown hair and I typed the wrong thing. He has blue eyes and they are gorgeous. Just like him.

It’s amazing the number of things you can get done when you get up at 6:20 am. I went home and instead of going back to bed, I did the following:
~Gave the dog a bath
~Cleaned the bathroom
~Cleaned my bedroom
~Cleaned the living room
~Did all but one load of laundry
~Did the dishes
~Sanded and stained my shelves
~Put down grass seed
~Made a peppercorn pork tenderloin for dinner

Then I finally sat down around 2pm. When I started to get cloudy out. I took a couple quick cat naps in the chair while sitting with the dog.

My weight loss continues to bounce all over the place and I have four weeks to get down to 150. It’s only 10 pounds, but that means that I have to hit the diet hard and lay off the drinking.

I also found myself smoking a lot this weekend. I have a pack and when that’s gone, I’m done smoking again.

Ok, I’m gotta hit the road now. Work is going to be slow today. Our system is still down from yesterday and there’s no ETA when it’s going to be back up. So it might be an early day as well.

Talk to ya soon!

I tell you what...

I've got a feeling that if I can't trick my mind into thinking that sleep is a good idea, tomorrow (hell, today) isn't going to be very pleasant (or at least I won't be).

Sigh. I hate it when I can't sleep.

Blah, blah and more blah.

Aimee’s been in one of her "I feel ugly, fat and worthless" moods this weekend. Blah. And because today I was having one of my famous "put myself down" days, I done went and pissed off Drew at lunch this afternoon and I honestly didn’t mean to, it’s just that I was feeling rather unimpressed with myself today so I said some negative things and he mistook my, "I just don’t like myself" comment to mean that I literally don’t like myself, and that’s not what I was trying to say. Not at all. I do like myself, I’m a great girl (trust me, I am and don’t let anyone convince you otherwise no matter how hard they try), but being great and looking great are two completely different things and I can attest to the fact that I do not look great, it’s quite the contrary my friends. So when I said, "I just don’t like myself," I meant the way I look, not me personally. You get me?

And then I got a lecture from my mom about not being able to get where I want to go unless I start being easier on myself. Her reasoning is, if I want to get to where it is I’m aiming, I have to be positive or else I’m never going to get anywhere because I’ll just end up getting discouraged and say to hell with it. As I’ve done so many times before.

Point taken.

Anyhow, because negativity is detrimental to my cause, I have promised to be a beacon of positivity with only minor allowances for brief episodes of negativity until I reach my goal.

So there you have it, I’ve had a blah weekend and I haven’t been very nice to myself. Bad Aimee. Cause I promised, I shall try my damndest to do better this week.

Wish me luck.

Who are you again?

Oh right! That other chick that used to post here. Gotcha. I knew your name was on the header for some reason.

So Hi everyone, I'm Angie and I'm an inconsistent blogger.

and apparently a multiple personality - or I just like to refer to myself in the third person.

I haven't been up to much. A few weeks back were a pretty bad time for me so wasn't into doing much of anything or talking to anyone. But things have markedly improved since then. I go through those deep/dark days every few months. Things just build and build and then they implode on me. I still have all the unresolved issues and crap like that, but for now it's been restuffed into the pocket from which it snuck out of.

So since then - the last time I blogged - we'll just go down a short list and I'll recap.

*Warning - nothing of great importance is below this - so if you are easily bored, don't read any further. But there may be pictures. If I can figure out how to make those work!

~Work.
It's work. It's finally nice to be making money and having extra to do things with. It's nice to not have to worry about what bills to pay with this check so whatever doesn't get shut off. As a matter of fact, I scheduled comcast to come out and install my DVR cause I'm tired of my damn VCR and messing with video tapes.

I don't think I'll be sticking with payroll. I'm really interested in our Assets Protection division. Last month at out monthly meeting, we had a high up from there come talk to us and it was really interesting! Of course, you all know that I'm mildly obsessed with forensics and such. I just bought a book that is a 'must read for all CSI fans!' called Forensic Detective. I haven't cracked it open yet, it's on my shelf with my other to be read books. But since I've started taking lunch at work, I've been reading. I'm on my second book! Woo! Yeah for me.
My boss is a good guy and he was very concerned about me a few weeks back.
There's an internal non-exempt job fair coming up next week that I'm going to to find out more about Assets Protection. So that's something.

This job is far too much customer service for me. I'm not a customer service type of person, in house for our own employees or not. Yuck.

My part time job has been keeping me busy the past few weeks. Last weekend I worked Saturday, then had to leave for the wedding, then Sunday I worked too.

For a while I was working weekends at the full time job too, that was rough. But probably what helped me get a head.

~Vegas
I'm going to Vegas in a few weeks with one of the girls I used to work with at my old job. She turns 30 and wanted to go to Vegas for her birthday. Her one friend that was going to go with her turned out to be too much of a diva about the whole thing, so she asked if I'd want to go and I am. We booked it a couple weeks ago and as it gets closer and closer, we're both getting more excited.
We're staying at the Tropicana, which everyone that's been to Vegas is a good place to stay and close to everything. We leave on a Saturday and come back on Thursday. She turns 30 the day after we get in.
We also got an email yesterday and they moved our flight times up which is awesome. Originally we weren't scheduled to leave until 10pm on Saturday and now they moved it up to 5 something. So I was Super Excited to read that email. I wasn't too keen on getting in at 10pm. Seven is muuuuccch better.

~My friend Katie just got married last weekend. I was nervous about going alone and all, but I ended up hangin out with a couple of former roommates. When we were at the church, milling around, Mom and Dad both came over and gave me a hug, glad to see me. And if I've ever talked about my ex's parents, I love them dearly. And they are not affectionate people, so the fact that they both hugged me - means a lot to me.

My ex came over and talked to us a few times. His dad came over to our table and asked me to go have a smoke with him. So we walked over to the other side of the building we were in and had a smoke together. He told me he's got three more years, but he's ready. His boys are all set and he's had a good life. That was depressing. Still is. But it was nice to talk to him and see him.

I have to get my butt up north and see them this summer.

~Boys/Men
I've had this long standing flirtation with my Sista's next door neighbor who has the prettiest (ya I know, not the most masculine way to describe a man, but it's my blog! :)) brown eyes and eyelashes. Well things progressed the weekend before last when I went up to play cards and hang out. He wanted to check out the hot tub, so he and I did while Sista had to make up with her girl. I won't get into the details but he's a great kisser and he likes to cuddle.

He's typically not someone I'd go for because he's shorter than me, and four years younger than me but he's got the eyes and he's oh so nice to look at. He's in the same boat that I am, being the last of a group of friends to be single. Besides that, he's got a great house, nice car that he bought last year. Just bought a riding lawn mower and paid cash for it. He's got a six year old son who's got his dad's eyes and from hanging out with him, he's a cool guy. He's sweet and funny and I love to flirt with him and hate it when he had a girlfriend. He maybe a bit of a player, but I don't think he would have messed with me if it was a one night thing. He knows how tight me and my Sista are and knows that neither of us would allow me to be treated badly.
As I've told Aimee, I don't have my hopes up cause then when nothing happens, I won't be that upset.

I haven't seen nor talked to him since that night and you can imagine the conversations I've had with myself about that. I'm going up to Sista's tomorrow afternoon to help her and her woman get ready for my niece and nephew's birthday party on Saturday, so we'll see how that goes.

~Brother is doing well. He's not sure about his summer employment yet. But he's working on it. He's decided to give his long distance relationship 100% and I'm glad he's made that commitment, but I'm also leery of any girl in his life. He is my baby brother after all and I will throw down with any bizzo that hurts him. In fact, I'm still hoping to run into his ex so I can pound her fat ass into mush. But that's another story for a different day.

~Friends
Katie and Jason got married.
Teresa is preggers and probably getting married in the fall after the baby. She and the new beau (Andy) are doing well. Daughter Brittany is doing well, she's excited about her new sibling and gets along well with Andy and generally seems happy.

~Family
Ready for this one? My mom has a boyfriend. Brother and I met him a few weeks back and from first impression he's a good guy. Former Navy man, eight kids who are of course are all grown, three of whom live in Cali. They(He and my mom) apparently want to introduce me to one of his daughters who's in the music biz and thinks she and I would have a lot in common.

We won't talk about all the rest, except to say that I'm having mixed feelings about it.

Sista is doing good. Her knee is healing well and she's sold all her toys that she could hurt herself with, except the riding lawn mower and her truck, but other than that she got rid of the four wheeler and the snowmobiles.

My other sista is doing pretty well too. My mini-me niece is going to Poland for a few weeks this summer with her Tap dance instructor. When we went over for her birthday she and I actually got to sit and talk for a while and just hang out, which was great. She seemed to be back to her self. Her brother and sister are also doing well. Sista's boyfriend had stopped drinking (he's or was such a drunk that I swear he pissed MGD or Icehouse) and apparently stopped smoking cause he couldn't do one without the other. We'll see how long that lasts.

My Aunt is good too. I don't see or talk to her as much as I would like and I should change that.

Haven't spoken with my dad in months, I guess he moved again. I missed the memo on that. Oh well.

I haven't spoken to my stpe-dad since he asked my if my mom was on drugs. Ok, stop laughing, I'm serious. So I let it go for a few days then emailed him and told him that we could meet for dinner and such but my mom was not to be a topic of conversation, and I haven't heard anything from him since.

~Car
The car is doing ok. I just had new tires put on. My gas mileage sucks but driving downtown everyday is wearing and tearing on her. Not having a car payment it the best thing ever. I'm just glad I don't have the new car bug. I don't like the new cars that are out anyways so that helps. I like my car, I just need Xhibit to come pimp it out for me, the way I'd pimp it though.

~Scrappie
Is as cute as ever. She lost her baby I bought her and neither one of us can find it. She loves going walking with mama, but has a hard time keeping up some days. I didn't think I walked that fast, but I am taller than her - by a lot~ LOL

I'm not posting pictures cause I look awful in ALL of the ones I'm in. (Plus I can't get it to work!!)

I'll do better about posting. Hope you are all doing well!

So Aims, whatcha been up to?

Well since you asked, I'll tell you. Not a damn thing.

Let's see...

Thursday--nothing. Friday--ah, I'm fairly sure I went to bed not long after I came home from work and pretty much stayed there so that'd fall under the category of nothing. Saturday--hmm, what did I do Saturday? I can't remember so chances are it was more of nothing, although, I did go out to dinner with Drew Saturday night to this little Cuban restaurant that had some kickass food. Sunday--amazingly enough, I actually worked up the energy to drag my ass out of the house on Sunday, we took Cameron to see 'Ice Age: The Meltdown' (funny movie, I enjoyed it). Monday--work, Curves, grocery store, TV, bed (in that order). Tuesday--work, a whole lot of TV (didn't 'House' rock?), bed (in that order). And today it's been more work and a whole bunch more TV (House done went and rocked again and I'm digging the word "trinogamous") during which I baked a cake for Cathy's birthday tomorrow...

Ain't I sweet? Not really, but go ahead, humor me, you know you wanna.

And that's all folks. My life is so anticlimactic I'm putting myself to sleep.